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Lisa Tantrum 

#TantrumTuesday Question 3: Does anyone have any good tips for dealing with tantrums? And to what lengths will you go to avert one while out and about?

TOP RESPONSE
LewisCarr 
I'm always ready with the "Ben, when you've finished screaming about this, Daddy will be just over there, having a frank exchange of views with this judgey old woman who has forgotten what good manners are, and how children really behave."
ALL RESPONSES
LewisCarr 
Sorry, just waiting until she cracks her watermelon open before I respond...
Ben Tantrum 
Man is she slow!
LewisCarr 
I've been relatively lucky, ours haven't been too bad. The little 'un looks like he might be worse in the future. I normally pick them up and remove them from the situation, and sit somewhere quiet with them. Holding tightly to stop flailing arms if I need to. When they calm down, they can go back to what they're doing. Never EVER give in though.
Lisa Tantrum 
I have a new trick for tantrums which is to look confused and say, 'Can you hear that? I can hear another baby crying and being naughty?' It confused the hell out of my son, but stopped him in his tracks long enough for him to forget the tantrum. And now he finds it funny. We're still too early for full-on tantrums and no doubt it won't work every time, but it's got us out of a few embarrassing situations/headaches so far...
LewisCarr 
...and always give a supportive nod to another parent who might be struggling.
rentrn35e 
There have been some great tips on this in the Brain already. For example I really liked this one: https://tantrum.xyz/parentingBrain/question/31 It basically talks about relocating the kid to snap them out of the emotional state and get them to explain why they're upset. Then try to elicit answers/reasons/solutions from the kid instead of telling them what to do. That encourages the kid to learn how to reason instead of just listen to instructions. This approach worked very well for me even when dealing with kids in Japan when I had a very limited grasp of Japanese .
LewisCarr 
I like the idea of doing the parent melt-down in the super-market, like in the advert, but I'm not sure that they would "get the irony" yet...
Ben Tantrum 
@LewisCarr removing them from the situation is a good tip - I'll use that one
Ktharveytaylor 
The worst ones are always at home, so, crack on, I say, we'll talk when you're finished. When my son was mid-terrible twos and had the odd 'lie on the ground thumping hands and feet' I would just look at whoever was passing with a 'what can you do?!' Expression. Normally the looks back were sympathetic
rentrn35e 
@LewisCarr @Benjy - Yep, can confirm (as I mentioned above) relocating works a treat
LewisCarr 
rentrn35e - are you Mike Barnes' superhero alter ego?
LewisCarr 
Ktharveytaylor - always support for another parent going through one, it'll be you tomorrow!
Minibugs Claire 
Distraction or ignoring the situation is working for us at the minute, sure we've got worse to come though
Ktharveytaylor 
Lewis Carr, there is always that element of fear, even now...
LewisCarr 
I'm always ready with the "Ben, when you've finished screaming about this, Daddy will be just over there, having a frank exchange of views with this judgey old woman who has forgotten what good manners are, and how children really behave."
Lisa Tantrum 
Next question is up. (sorry)

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